Well, I think Maddie and I had one of those. I've been reading the blog of an amazing woman, Christine over at Welcome to My Brain. She is truly an amazing parent. She's got RAD kiddos too, but she's much better at parenting them than I am.
But, I can learn. She shared some about her daughter's need to win all the time and I certainly could relate to that as my Maddie is the same way. The way it most clearly comes out recently is in school. If she can't be the best in her class at something, she decides that it is not worth her time. So she doesn't do it.
That's been what's happening around her and the report card is showing it. There are a few classes where she rocks because she's really good at those things. The other things, though she can do them well enough, she's not the best and so she just lets it slide and doesn't care if she fails those classes. My challenge now, is to determine how to show her that she can be on top with those other classes. That she can win something and it will be good for her.
Pray for me, I need some wisdom from above on this one. I know that her education is not the most important thing in the world, but if she continues to fail, it will certainly effect her ability to do well in life and that will just result in the downhill spiral that she seems to be aspiring to and that her birth mom existed within.
I am really hoping to find a way to motivate her and show her that she CAN!!!
Keep having conversations!
ReplyDeleteHave a great Sunday
Christine is awesome...if you email her, she'll chit chat back.
We've shared some too...although my step-son (it's his choice I call him that, not mine) isn't diagnosed with RAD or ODD, I know he struggles with hidden grumblings from his parent's divorce.
We just keep having conversations
He doesn't always like them
And he doesn't always like me...
heck there are days he swears he doesn't love me...and definitely days I feel that
But it's about more than that for me...although it can hurt at times, I know I'm in his life to show him love no matter what...and I'll take the heavy heart now for the heavy crown in Heaven later!
Blessings to you!
Thanks for the encouragement Babs, and for visiting my blog. It's nice to know someone is interested! :D I know what you mean about having kids not love you. In 6.5 years, I've heard it from my son maybe twice. I really do believe he does though. Maddie says she loves me, or used to, quite often, but it was fake and we finally talked about it where I asked her not to say it unless she truly meant it. She hasn't said it since. She is too in love with her fantasy of her birth mom to share that emotion with me yet. Maybe one day.
ReplyDeleteThanks again for the conversation.
I love you mommy :) lol <3
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