She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not

I'm still pondering on the question of what would I not give up.  God has provided some new perspective on that question.  The result?  A whole new bunch of things I may need to give up.  I thought I'd list them for you so you could see whether you can relate.

1.     the trip to Paris I've been dreaming of taking for a very long time
2.     the opportunity to photograph places and things in freedom when the mood strikes
3.     travel in general
4.     money/financial security
5.     carefree living
6.     quiet and solitude
7.     sleep
8.     my own selfish desire/my way
9.     my photography career
10.   a worry free life (I know, this was a fantasy from the beginning)
11.   a plan, my plan
12.   comfort
13.   relationships in the way I've maintained them
14.   a beautiful home

I'm sure that there are plenty of other things, but those are the ones that come to mind at present.  The funny thing is that it's tempting to me to worry over whether I can live without those things.  I can sit and ponder whether or not I should obey God.  Heelllllllooooooo!!!  Why would I even think such a thing.  I know that nothing comes from ignoring God's call on my life.  I know that I don't want to be Jonah. Still, some things feel like more than I can bear to give up. 

Somehow the idea of never going to Paris is truly painful to me.

There, I've typed it.  Not sure I feel any better.  It sounds so shallow.  But there it is.  It's honest, it's how I feel inside.  Ugh!!!  I've clearly got a bit more work to do.  So, how bout you?  What can you just not let go of?


  1. Hmmm.... we really ARE in the same boat! My hubby told me the last time we flew that its the LAST time he flew UNLESS God required him to fly to a destination to serve Him.

    Uh-oh... there goes Italy! My dream for the past ten years or so has been to visit Italy thoroughly, leisurely and practically: to live there for a long stay. Not happening... nope! But I keep photos around to see Italy from time to time, and to remember the life I imagined there.

    Sigh... shot down dreams are truly painful. Thinking of you!

  2. I know exactly what you mean. Leisurely is exactly the kind of visit I want. Like 6 months to a year in those exotic places. Problem is, once I got France under my belt, I'd be on to Italy too, then Great Britain and all of the British Isles. Next China, India, then on to Argentine, oh, and lets not forget the great destinations in America. So many places, so little time (and money!)


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